A friend and I went out for lunch the other day and while out, spotted an NYC police officer on a scooter. It occurred to us that there is an inherent degree of respectability for an officer based on the size of their vehicle. Here they are from most to least respectable. I’m pretty sure scooter cops must have made someone mad further up the food chain.

The standard cruiser sits at the top of the respectability ladder.

nypd car
Photo by timetrax23

This small single passenger vehicle is a little lower down.

Police car
Photo by Hinnosaar

And the lowly scooter is at the bottom.

Scooter Police
Photo by Seth W

This post is in no way meant to show that I have disrespect for the individual officers themselves but just as their uniforms command respect, their vehicles also confer a certain status to them. At least in the eyes of us proletariat.

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I made a shocking discovery last week when I started listening to Exile on Main Street by The Rolling Stones. The classic guitar riff in La Grange by ZZ Top is not their own. Bah bah bum…! How did I come to this amazing conclusion? On Exile on Main Street, The Rolling Stones cover a blues song called Shake Your Hips by Slim Harpo. That song has pretty much the same riff that ZZ Top uses to such brilliance on La Grange.

Harpo’s song came out in 1966, the Stones covered it in 1972, and ZZ Top released La Grange in 1973. I think it’s safe to say that ZZ Top was certainly influenced by if not outright stole that riff. However, I’m sure with more research I might be able to discover that Slim Harpo appropriated it from somebody else as well. Such is the nature of music.

This discovery does not diminish my appreciation for ZZ Top, aka “the home team”. I’ve always been a fan and will continue to be so. As a matter of fact, I think I need to own Tres Hombres on CD or maybe even album. Hello eBay!

The links below will allow you to hear for yourself.

Shake Your Hips by Slim Harpo

Shake Your Hips by The Rolling Stones

La Grange by ZZ Top

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Don't even think of parking here
Photo by Lord Biro

Sometimes “No Parking” just doesn’t get the message across so the NYC Department of Transportation has to pull out the big guns.

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Here’s how I manage to get a smooth comfortable shave without putting a dime in Gillette’s pocket. The short answer is that I shave with an old school double edge razor. I have for years. The long answer goes a bit further.

Gillette’s not all bad, but their razor arms race is ridiculous and expensive. Eight Fusion blades for $24? What if I told you that you could buy enough blades to last months and months for less than $20?  It’s true but you have to make some changes first.

To start with, you’ll need to get a new blade holder. There are several ways to go, Gillette used to produce an excellent adjustable double edge blade holder that can still be found for a reasonable price on eBay. The great thing about an adjustable holder is that you can… adjust it? Seriously, the dial allows you to change the blade angle from forgiving to more aggressive as your skill with using it improves so it’s a good beginner holder.

There are other options as well, I shaved with an expensive Merkur Futur for several years. It’s a well made holder that’s also adjustable but it’s quite heavy and I eventually found it to be a little too aggressive. You really have to be on your game to use it.

My current blade holder is a Parker 22R, it’s not adjustable but the blade angle is fairly forgiving and very comfortable. I would definitely recommend it for a beginner. It also looks great and has a nice weight to it.

Now that you have a blade holder, you’ll need blades and here’s where you get to stick it to Gillette, big time. How about a hundred blades for $16? It’s true! You’re probably thinking “How good could they be if they’re so cheap?” I did but I was willing to spend $16 to find out.

I’m here to tell you that they’re really, really good. Prior to finding them, I used to pay about $4 for 5 Wilkinson Sword blades which I thought were pretty good. The Sharp blades are significantly better. They give me a comfortable shave and last just as long, if not longer, as the multi-blade Gillettes and Schicks of the world.

One niggle about double edge blades that even the Sharp’s are guilty of although not as much as the Wilkinson Sword. Almost invariably, one side will be sharper than the other. I don’t know why but I’ve been using double edge blades for a long time and it has held true with every brand I’ve tried. Nevertheless, the blades themselves are so much cheaper than the multi-blades that even if you only use one side, you still come out wayyyy ahead on cost.

Here are a few tips for getting started with a double edge blade. I shave in the shower so that my beard, which is fairly heavy, has plenty of time to get soft. Next, I use shaving oil before applying shaving cream. I’ve been using it for a couple of years and it’s amazing how much more comfortable it made shaving.

I’m a green, treehugger’y, organic type guy so I use Kiss My Face moisture shave. It’s the only natural shave cream I’ve found that equals the more commercial brands like Gillette or Nivea. It costs about the same but goes a whole lot further. You don’t need to use very much of it per shave.

And lastly, go slow and shave with the grain when you’re starting out with a double edge razor. It’ll take a few shaves to learn the contours of your face, particularly your chin, and the best angles for holding the razor but your patience will definitely pay off. Nicks are a possibility but like any new skill, you’ll improve with time.

I’ve been shaving this way, as I said, for years and I rarely ever get razor burn, nicks, or bumps. Shaving is almost a pleasure which is high praise considering that it involves dragging a really sharp blade across some of the most sensitive skin on your body. Anyway, I hope you’ll give it a try. With patience and very little money, you’ll transform your morning shave into an inexpensive, comfortable experience and not give Gillette a penny.

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Have you ever attempted to repair, build, or work with an object and it feels as if it’s fighting you every step of the way? I have, lots. My Dad likes to tell a story about pulling into the driveway one day and a wrench came flying down it. I was working on my motorcycle at the time and it was fighting me, the hurled wrench was my way of dealing with it. Patience has never been one of my stronger traits.

Anyway, this weekend I discovered there’s a clever little theory that defines those times when objects are against me.  It’s called Resistentialism. The theory is a spoof of existentialism and its slogan is “Les choses sont contre nous“  which translates as “Things are against us”. I’ve struggled with it my whole life and I never knew it had a name.

I’m happy to say that I’m getting better at recognizing when things are exhibiting resistentialism and I suspect I’ll get even better at noticing it now that I know its name . These days I tend to step away when an object is fighting me until I cool down but I’m not above throwing a wrench or using a persuader (aka hammer) if I’m losing badly enough. Small steps, small steps…

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The ninja monkeys from an earlier post have inspired me to set a goal for myself. I’ve been bicycle commuting more or less for a couple of years but I still haven’t managed a full five day workweek commute.

I think the best I’ve done is either three or maybe four days a week and it’s been quite a while since I’ve even done that. So I’m announcing it here in front of the internet and everybody that I’d like to accomplish a full five day workweek commute on my bike by the end of September.

Meeting a goal deserves a reward, the ninja monkeys got peanuts for their successful escape. I’m gonna have to come up with something better than that because while I love peanuts, it’s not much of a reward for a human. Perhaps the satisfaction of setting a goal and meeting it will be reward enough? If not, I’ll just eat a whole pint of Ben & Jerry’s. :P

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I was listing to Paranoid by Black Sabbath the other evening and was reminded of one of my favorite cheats in the art of songwriting, rhyming the same word with itself. I can only come up with the two samples below but I know there are more and I always get a little thrill when I hear them.

War Pigs by Black Sabbath
Generals gathered in their masses
Just like witches at black masses

Get It Together by Beastie Boys and Q-tip
I eat the fuckin’ pineapple now & laters
Don’t listen to me now, listen to me later

At this point you may be a little concerned that I listen to both Black Sabbath and the Beastie Boys but they’re closer together than you might think. METAL!!!!

UPDATE: Not to pick on the Beastie Boys but by accident I came across another sample of the aforementioned cheat.

Pass the Mic by Beastie Boys
Everybody’s rappin’ like it’s a commercial
Acting like life is a big commercial

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